Man & Woman Jokes        RSS 2.0

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• 710

  21 July 2008, by Editor

  Yesterday I was having some work done on my car at the Ford dealer.

  While I was talking to Bert the Mechanic a woman came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.... We all looked at each other, and the Bert asked, ’What is a seven-hundred-ten?’

  She replied, ’You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine. I lost it and need a new one. It had always been there.’

  Bert gave the woman a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car which had the hood up and asked, ’Is there a 710 on this car ?’ She pointed and said, ’Of course, its right there.’

  Do you know what a "710" is? If not, check the image below:

  (It is "OIL")

• The Math

  21 July 2008, by Editor

  1. Smart man + smart woman = romance

  2. Smart man + dumb woman = pregnancy

  3. Dumb man + smart woman = affair

  4. Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage

  5. Smart boss + smart employee = profit

  6. Smart boss + dumb employee = production

  7. Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

  8. Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

• No Fear

  21 July 2008, by Editor

  One bright, beautiful Sabbath morning everyone in the tiny Midwestern town got up early and went to the local church. Before the services started the towns people were sitting in their pews when suddenly Satan appeared at the front of the church.

  Everyone started screaming and running for the exit, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from the evil incarnate.

  Soon everyone evacuated from the church except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew. He was not moving and seemed oblivious to the fact that God’s ultimate enemy was in his presence.

  Now, this confused and irritated the Devil a little bit, so he walked up to the man and said, "Don’t you know who I am?" "Yep, sure do," replied the elderly gentleman. Satan asked, "Aren’t you afraid of me?" "Nope, sure ain’t ," the gentleman replied.

  Satan, a little more perturbed at this, asked, "Why aren’t you afraid of me?" The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for 48 years."

• Dearly Departed

  21 July 2008, by Editor

  A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave.

  The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?"

  The first man approached him and said, "Sir, I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?"

  The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, "My wife’s first husband."