Bank Jokes        RSS 2.0

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• Hands in his own pockets

  15 March, by Editor

  A young banker decided to get his first tailor made suit. So he went to the finest tailor in town and got measured for a suit. A week later he went in for his first fitting. He put on the suit and he looked stunning, he felt that in this suit he can do business.

  As he was preening himself in front of the mirror he reached down to put his hands in the pockets and to his surprise he noticed that there were no pockets. He mentioned this to the tailor who asked him, "Didn’t you tell me you were a banker?"

  The young man answered, "Yes, I did."

  To this the tailor said, "Who ever heard of a banker with his hands in his own pockets?"

• Online Banking

  15 March, by Editor

  TECH: Hello, Friendly Internet. May I help you?

  CUSTOMER: Oh, hello young man. I was wondering if you offer online banking?

  TECH: We’re an Internet service provider, ma’am. You can certainly use our service to connect to online banking.

  CUSTOMER: What do I need to do that?

  TECH: You just need the modem in your computer. That plugs into a phone jack. Sign up for an account, and sign up for online banking with your bank.

  CUSTOMER: But where does the money come out?

  TECH: I’m not sure I understand?

  CUSTOMER: You know...Does the money come out from that slot on the computer?

• Country-Club Party

  15 March, by Editor

  At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl.

  Immediately he began paying her court and flattering her outrageously.

  The girl liked the young man, but she was taken a bit aback by his fast and ardent pitch. She was amazed when after 30 minutes he seriously proposed marriage.

  "Look," she said. "We only met a half hour ago. How can you be so sure? We know nothing about each other."

  "You’re wrong," the young man declared. "For the past 5 years I’ve been working in the bank where your father has his account."

• Two lawyers are in a bank...

  15 March, by Editor

  Two lawyers are in a bank, when armed robbers suddenly burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers, including the lawyers, up against a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, etc. While this is going on lawyer number one jams something in lawyer number two’s hand.

  Without looking down, lawyer number two whispers, “What is this?”

  To which lawyer number one replies, “It’s that $50 I owe you.”

• Bank Name

  15 March, by Editor

  Mother decided that 10-year-old Cathy should get something ’practical’ for her birthday.

  "Suppose we open a savings account for you?" mother suggested. Cathy was delighted.

  "It’s your account, darling," mother said as they arrived at the bank, "so you fill out the application."

  Cathy was doing fine until she came to the space for ’Name of your former bank.’ After a slight hesitation, she put down ’Piggy.’