Jokes@JokesLab   |  JokesLab Magazine  |  JokesLab TV  |  JokesLab Funny Videos   |  JokesLab Games   |   Support   |   Privacy  |  BookMark This Page
Animal Jokes Blonde Jokes Computer Jokes Funny Pictures Lawyer Jokes Medical Jokes Misc. Jokes
Political Jokes Redneck Jokes Relationship Restaurant Jokes Sports Jokes Work Jokes Top Rated Jokes
People Jokes Top 10 Lists Campus Jokes Most Popular Jokes Latest Jokes (RSS feed)
Click here read the FREE bi-weekly JokesLab Magazine
Jokes and funny pictures; The No.1 online magazine dedicated for jokes and funny pictures!

Submit a Joke
Click here to Send us your Joke
share your jokes or funny pictures with others!!
Sponsors

Redneck Jokes



WINDERS 98
MICROSOFT NEWS RELEASE:
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Georgia edition of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside Georgia. If you have one of the Georgia editions you may need some help understanding thecommands.

The Georgia edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.

    It reads WINDERS 98 with abackground picture of the General Lee super imposed on a Confederate flag. It is shippedwith a Daisy Duke screen saver.

Also note:

Recycle Bin is labeled Outhouse
My Computer is called This Infernal Contraption
Dialup Networking is called Good Ol' Boys
Control Panel is known as the Dern Dashboard
Hard Drive is referred to as 4 wheel drive
Floppies are them little ole plastic disc thangs.

Other features:

    Instead of an error message you geta winder covered with a garbage bag and duct tape.

OK = ats aww-right
cancel = hail no
reset = awa shoot
yes = shore
no = Naaaa
find = hunt-fer it
go to = over yonder
back = back yonder
help = hep me out here
stop = ternit off
start = crank it up
settings = sittins
programs = stuff that does stuff
documents = stuff I done done

    Also note that winders 98 does notrecognize capital letters or punctuation marks.

    Some programs that are exclusive towinders 98:

tiperiter................A word processor
colering book............a graphics program
addin mershene...........calculator
scratch paper ...........notepad
jupe-box ................CD Player
inner-net................Microsoft Explorer
pichers..................A graphics viewer
IRS......................M/S accounting software
IRS2.....................M/S accounting software with hidden files
coon dog.................American kennel club records
fishin...................Bass Anglers Sportsman Society records.
NRA......................National Rifle Association
shot gun ................Remington Arms price list
riffel...................Winchester price list
pisstel..................Smith & Wesson price list
truck....................Ford & Chevrolet dealers in GA. by zip code
house....................Nearest Mobil home repair service by zip code
car .....................same as truck, just need two lists in Texas
cuzzins..................family history usually a 3 meg file
tax records..............usually an empty file
shells...................ammunition inventory, another 3 meg file
bud......................list of Budwiser dealers by zip code
racin....................NASCAR racing schedule includes list of TV stations that carry the race car n' truck
Parts.......nearest Junk yard by zip code
doc .....................veterinarians by zip code

    We regret any inconvenience it mayhave caused if you received a copy of the Georgia edition. You may return it to Microsoftfor a replacement version.



Next

Rate this Joke

Very Good

Good

Average

Poor

Very Poor

Send This Joke to Your Friend
Friend's Name
Friend's Email
Your Name
Your Email
Funny Pictures
To My Friend...

Jokes
Penis Demands a Raise
I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: * I do physical labor * I work at great depths * I work head first * I do not get weekends off or public holidays * I work in a damp environment * I don't get paid overtime or shift penalties * I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation * I work in high temperatures * My work exposes me to contagious diseases Response from the administration: After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons: * You do not work 8 hours straight * You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods *You do not always follow the orders of the management team * You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas * You take a lot of non-roistered breaks * You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working * You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift * You don't always observe H&S measures, such as wearing the correct protective gear * You don't wait till pension age before retiring * You don't like working double shifts * You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work * And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the work place carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.
Google
Subscribe
It is 100% FREE. Sign up for the FREE Bi-weekly Jokes@JokesLab to recieve jokes and funny pictures in your email! And to read online archived magazines of Jokes@JokesLab in MEMBERS ONLY AREA!!!
 

Jokes for Your Site
Click here to add Daily Jokes to Your Site, It's FREE
Adding jokes on your site will definitely attract more vistors!!!


   
Copyright © www.jokeslab.com      Hosting provided by: Ptrhosting Inc