1) Wine her.
2) Dine her.
3) Call her.
4) Hug her.
5) Hold her.
6) Surprise her.
7) Compliment her.
8) Smile at her.
9) Laugh with her.
10) Cry with her
11) Cuddle with her.
12) Shop with her.
13) Give her jewelry.
14) Buy her flowers.
15) Hold her hand.
16) Write love letters to her.
17) Write poetry for her.
18) Go to the end of the earth and back again for her.
How to Impress a Man:
1) Show up naked.
2) Bring beer.
Ventriloquist and the Polack A ventriloquist had just finished his polack joke routine when a huge, drunk polack confronted him, ''I'm sick of your polack jokes and I'm going to knock the shit out of you.'' ''I'm sorry, it was all in good fun,'' replied the comedian. The polack retorted, ''I was talking to little asshole on your knee."
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