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Listing 20 Jokes in this Category - Misc. Jokes

Joke Rating Hits
The Programmer and the Princess
0.00 212
Hostage Situation
0.00 199
Troubled Man
0.00 215
True [Stupid] Crime Stories
0.00 262
Masochism Tango
0.00 200
Don't Make Me Bible Belt You
0.00 202
All-Purpose Excuse Form Letter
0.00 233
Door-to-Door Sales Crap
0.00 223
Elephant and Man
0.00 192
God Helps Me Pee
0.00 235
The Pirate
0.00 215
The Bar on the 23rd Floor
0.00 225
50 Things to Do in a Mall
0.00 242
Bad Dog
0.00 215
Ghetto Shopping
0.00 221
Bush's Tragedy
0.00 209
Atlanta School Board
0.00 196
Divine Flatulence
0.00 208
Interview don'ts
0.00 192
Fast Food Job Application
0.00 216
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Jokes
Gassy Broad
Once upon a time there lived a woman in Brampton who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them, but unfortunately they always gave her a very embarrassing, and somewhat lively reaction. When it became apparent that she and her boyfriend would marry she thought to herself, ''He is such a sweet and gentle man but I don't think he can live with my problems.'' So she decided to make the supreme sacrifice and give up beans.

A year later her car broke down on the way home from work. Since she lived in the country, she called her husband and told him she would be late because she had to walk home. On her way, she passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than she could stand. Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she could walk off any ill effect by the time she reached home. So she stopped at the diner, and before she knew it she had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home she putt-putted.

Upon arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it. Her husband seemed excited to see her, exclaming delightedly, ''Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight.'' He then blindfolded her then led her to a chair at the table. Just as he was about to remove the blindfold the phone rang. He made her promise not to touch the blindfold till he came back. Then he went to answer the phone.

The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted the weight to one leg, and let it go. It was not only loud, but it smelt like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk coming froma pulp mill. She took a napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously. Then she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded her of cabbage cooking. Keeping her ears turned to the conversation in the other room, she went on like this for another ten minutes. When the phone farewells signed the end of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more times with the napkin, placed it on her lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contently to herself, she was the picture of innocence when her husband returned. Apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked and she assured him that she had not. At this point, he removes the blindfold to reveal twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a first Happy Anniversary!

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