The inmate on death row was scheduled tobe put to death by firing squad the follow morning. Throughout the day, the prison guardswere being very nice to him. But when they asked him if he wanted something specificfor his last meal, he said he didn't want anything special. When they asked if therewas something special he wanted to do, he said nothing. It went on like this allday.Finally, when he was put before thefiring squad, the guard asked if he wanted a cigarette and a blindfold."No," the inmate said,"just get it over with.""Well, is there anything that I cando for you before you go?" said the guard. "You didn't even want a speciallast meal!"The inmate thought. "Actually," he said, "Music is my life. One thing I would reallylike would be to sing my favorite song, one whole time through, with nointerruptions."The guard nodded and told him to goahead.The inmate started, "One billionbottles of beer on the wall..."
The Programmer and the Princess A programmer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, “If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess.” He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week.” The programmer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do anything you want.” Again the programmer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, “What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?” The programmer said, “Look, I'm a programmer. I don't have time for a girlfriend -- but a talking frog, now that's cool.”
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