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Greed
There once was a man named Joe and he was talking to God and he asked, ''How much is a penny worth in heaven?''

God replied, ''One million dollars.''

Then Joe asked, ''How long is a minute in heaven?''

God said, ''One million years.''

So Joe asked for a penny and God said, ''Sure, just wait a minute.''


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The Birds, The Bees, The Bushettes
Ever since the Bush daughters got into trouble with the law for underage drinking, the President has lectured them constantly about the evils of alcohol. His daughters were tired of having the same conversation week after week, so they finally said, "Okay daddy, we understand about drinking already, but you've never talked about to us about sex."

Getting very upset, W. chided the twins: "Young ladies, we do not use that dirty four-letter word in our home!"

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